When you get to the point in your life where you realize you have some worth, something to give to the world, you realize everyone does. It’s painful to see people calling other people stupid or useless. It’s simply not true. To be entirely “useless” you have to have absolutely nothing to offer. Sure, there will be some situations you might be useless in, but you are not entirely useless. I’m useless in car maintenance. I’ve never done it, never tried. I’m useless in vascular surgery. I’ve never done it, never tried. But I am not entirely useless.
No one is useless. Everyone makes some bad decisions. If you have made some stupid ones then let’s just call it what it is but know that even then, you are not useless.
I remember being an “emo” kid in high school. I didn’t really have all that bad of a time but I did get picked at a little for it. I set myself up for it a bit with the wild hair and weird clothes though. I realize now I wasn’t an “emo” kid. What I was, and what I am today, is interpersonally and intrapersonally intelligent. I understood what I felt and why I felt it, why I wanted what I wanted. I also understood how to read people and how to relate and connect with them. I didn’t enjoy gossip and small talk and enjoyed talking about deeper things in life. Well, at 15 years old guess who didn’t want to ponder with me..*looks at camera* No one did. I enjoyed music with deep lyrics about feelings and love. The songs I loved so much sort of molded me into who I am today because they confirmed things I felt. It was very connecting for me to know other people in the world thought higher than how many girls you could have sex with, how drunk you could get, how you looked, or how well you played sports. Had I not found that connecting point and confirmation that I wasn’t totally alone I may have never experienced any success at all, just wandering about looking for anything.
The lawn maintenance worker is not stupid. He is likely spatially intelligent. The musician is not stupid. I hear a lot of jokes about how athletes are stupid, it’s wrong. They are kinestheticslly intelligent. Our society seems to think only CEOs and math experts are intelligent.
Please, don’t succumb to a feeling of uselessness. We all have something to offer. Don’t look down upon someone with an illness or a handicap either, they have something too. Likely something amazingly deep and beautiful. What of the above can you offer? Where can you find yourself? If you are linguistic then I hope you write! If you are spatial then I hope you build! The kinesthetic person may not find you intelligent, but don’t call them a jock if you are interpersonal. Embrace your interpersonal intelligence and respect it and yourself enough to know that kinsthetic person is only aware of their sport-friendly, instinctual intelligence. So help them. Spread your intelligence by embracing your own and being happy for others. You can connect with other people by acknowledging they have something natural they may not realize. Wouldn’t it be amazing if they then realized the same about you? That they could share with you and you could share with them.
In Terry Border’s lovely children’s story Peanut Butter & Cupcake!, she writes this for her closest friend, who you gather from the story is very different from the author:
This is so simple that children practice this. The simple things become difficult as adults though. That’s why they are so beautiful and powerful. We all seek to come back to the simple things. We lose sight of this as an adult because we focus so much on how little others have to lift ourselves. We all hurt at times and we are all seeking what we are. It is so much more satisfying to find what lifts others, find what others are good at, and then I believe we will see ourselves. We rob ourselves of connection and joy when we compare ourselves instead of embrace ourselves and others, then we want to be mad at the world for not being fair to us. Edit
I love this scripture. Matthew 18:2-4:
2 He called a little child to him, and placed the child among them. 3 And he said: “Truly I tell you, unless you change and become like little children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven. 4 Therefore, whoever takes the lowly position of this child is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven.
What is your intelligence? Are you really still “useless?”